Of Dead Bodies and Nosy Neighbors
by BeneaththeWords
Summary: Based on the AU: "You have to stop leaving dead bodies in my kitchen."


**AN: This is a oneshot written in the gtav universe using my best friend's OC (Aubrey Parker) and mine (Sage Pierce). It's just a little snippet of a larger story we have in the works and I wrote it mostly for the sake of practice. However, any feedback is incredibly appreciated, especially of that towards the characters we've written. I have other oneshots I've written, too, that I'd be willing to post if anyone is interested in those as well and you can let me know!**

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The potent smell of bleach accompanied by a hint of iron lingered down the seventh floor of Sage's apartment building. She had just rounded the corner after ascending a final flight of stairs when the familiar concoction hit her nostrils, causing her to stop in her tracks for a moment as she tried to put her finger on the scent. She tried to reason that maybe her neighbor, Frankie, had got shot in the ass yet again, or that maybe old Ms. Sylvia was doing yet another quarantine-esque cleanout of her apartment, but as Sage got closer to her door, she knew the smell was coming from her apartment and her apartment only. She wanted to kick herself. Instead, however, Sage just clutched the brown grocery bag closer to her chest, her other hand pressing her fingers against her eyelids in an attempt to keep them from rolling into the back of her head.

"The blonde chick is back."

Sage nearly dropped her bag, her hand falling from her eyes to clutch at her chest where her heart was beating rapidly. She turned around to see Frankie standing in his doorway across from her. The only thing that adorned his aging body was a fading towel wrapped around his waist that made his beer gut only that much more prominent. She knew her neighbor couldn't have been more than 35, but he looked ten years older as he stood there. Sage supposed cigarettes will do that to you.

"She brought someone with her," He informed her, scratching at the stubble that was forming at his jaw.

"You get a good look at who?" Sage raised her eyebrows.

Frankie just shrugged. "Not really. She was practically dragging him by the looks of it. Didn't know people still got that hammered at one in the afternoon."

Sage scoffed, "Speak for yourself." She'd never forget the time she had come home after a meeting with Michael to find him sprawled across her couch, mumbling incoherently that his ex-wife was going to steal all his shit. She had to haul his drunk ass out of her room herself, vowing to never leave her door unlocked again. It wasn't until after she'd shoved him up against his own door did she remind him he didn't even have an ex-wife.

"He reeked, too," Frankie said, choosing to ignore her comment. "Anyways, I gotta go, I'm pretty sure one of the ladies down at the bar thinks her kid is mine. She told me she'd cut my balls off if I didn't go take a test."

"Damn," Sage replied. "Aren't those tests expensive?"

"Just like everything else in this damn world." Frankie shook his head.

"Well, good luck. Hope it 'ain't yours." Sage gave him a half smile.

"Yeah, me too," He sighed. "Take it easy, Sage."

"Yeah, well I gotta go take care of this shit," She gestured towards the door.

He gave a short laugh, shutting his door.

Sage turned around, her hand running itself through her hair, causing little strands to fall from her small ponytail and frame her face. She was just putting off the inevitable at this point, not having to second guess what would be behind her door. It wasn't even locked the way it was when she left and as she pushed the door ajar slightly, her predictions were confirmed.

"For fuck's sake."

Sage threw her free hand into the air, her face reading nothing more than passive annoyance. Just a mere few feet in front of her was Aubrey, squatting in her kitchen and hovering over a body bag that was partially unzipped, revealing an unconscious man inside. A bucket of suds sat next to her as she haphazardly scrubbed away at the smeared crimson that was then staining her tile. She wore a white tank top that had blood tinting its hem and black shorts that did nothing to stop the red liquid from coming in contact with her legs. Sage could've laughed at how she still wore yellow rubber gloves and a surgical mask if the situation had been any different.

Aubrey stopped mid scrub when she heard Sage, looking like a deer in headlights. "I can explain," She got out quickly, her voice muffled by the blue mask.

"Haven't heard that one before," Sage retorted sarcastically as she set her groceries on the table to her right. She wanted to be mad, but the longer Aubrey stared at her wide eyed the more comical the situation got.

"Aubs," Sage started, placing a fist against her hip, "You've really gotta stop leaving dead bodies in my kitchen."

"Where else am I supposed to put them?" Aubrey asked with a humor to her voice, running the back of her hand across her forehead.

"Anywhere but my kitchen!" Sage bit back. "Can't you just - I don't know, throw him in a dumpster or something?"

"No, I can't just dump him into a dumpster." Aubrey rolled her eyes, resuming her scrubbing. She pinched the man's sleeve, tossing his arm over his torso and pulled the bag around him more.

"Then go drop him off someplace in Sandy Shores. Nobody'll care if you toss him out there." Sage shook her head, pulling out a pack of cigarettes from her grocery bag. "My apartment ain't a storage unit for the dead, y'know." She unwrapped the pack, sticking one between her teeth. "Frankie was right, this place smells like shit."

"I can't get rid of this body. It'll come in handy later."

"Tell me you weren't the one who killed him." Sage pulled her lighter from her back pocket.

Aubrey gave her a look. "Course I wasn't. Trevor took care of that."

"Yeah, well tell him to take care of the fucking bodies while he's at it." Sage said in between lighting her cigarette. "Seriously, one of these days Frankie or some other nosy neighbor of mine is gonna mention something to the cops. How'd you even get passed my landlord anyways?"

"Anthony?" Aubrey shrugged. "I bet he's seen worse." She flashed Sage a wicked smile.

"Oh, so you're on a first name basis with my landlord? Great." Sage said dryly.

"He finds me charming, what can I say?" Aubrey let out a chortle.

"Yeah, yeah, just hurry up with the cleaning." Sage stepped closer to the body, peering over it and Aubrey. "Jesus," She breathed. "He stab him to death? There's blood all over him."

"Didn't care to look," Aubrey replied, "It was bad enough I had to drag his ass up here."

"I find it hard to believe you did."

"Yeah, well Trevor's promised me a big bonus for this. Gotta prove those lost bastards a point." Aubrey replied in a satisfied tone for someone who was cleaning up after a dead person.

"Do I get a bonus for storing this 'point'?" Sage took a huff of the poison that sat between her lips.

"No," Aubrey zipped the bag completely closed and stood up. "But I'll buy you a coffee?"

Sage thought about it for a minute before huffing out a small groan.

"Fine - but make it a beer. Or three."


End file.
